Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Let me count the ways Ross is the worst


Here's a question that'll haunt me for the rest of my life: Did I really spend 10 years of my youth willfully ignoring how terrible Ross is, or did I genuinely like him?

Because, like everyone who has Netflix and enjoys watching shows exclusively about white people in NYC, I've been rewatching Friends with my boyfriend and I'm finding it nearly impossible to root for Ross and Rachel.

Because Ross is the worst.

He's not even just kind of annoying but mostly endearing, like Joey, or goofily charming like Chandler. He's just Ross. Whiny, mopey Ross.

So let's start with that.

1. He's whiny. SO whiny. How did I not notice how whiny he was?

2. He's a total Nice Guy™ who believes in the "friendzone."

3. His inner monologue is without a doubt a repetition of, "I'm everything you want, I'm everything you need, I'm everything inside of you that you wish you could be. I say all the right things at exactly the right time but I mean nothing to you and I don't know why," with a little, "maybe I'll actually tell her how I feel today. Aw shucks, I can't!" thrown in for good measure.

4. He's an idiot. How are you going to let everyone else tell Rachel how you feel and then come back from China with a girlfriend ON THE SEASON FINALE NO LESS. How dare you put me through that cliff-hanging bullshit as a child.

5. He's too boring to think of a #5.

Who knew Chandler and Phoebe would be my favorites this time around.

20 comments:

  1. I totally agree, I never really understood Ross. He's whiny and boring and him and Rachael's story was just too long and complicated in my opinion. Still love friends though.

    Emma x
    Writing Essays With Wine

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  2. Aww, I still like Ross. But then, I've always liked the Nice Guy.


    Although he kind of kills it with his constant, "We were on a break!"

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  3. I still hate Ross for cheating on Rachel. No... they were NOT on THAT kind of break. But I'm happy they ended up together. Those two things don't really seem to go together... but it's how I feel. I also love Chandler. He and Monica were always my favorites. I was so happy when they ended up together.


    -Kate
    www.theflorkens.com

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  4. THANK YOU! Ross is by far my least favorite Friend. He always acted so elitist towards the others (ooh, look at me, I'm a professor and I'm better than you) like, remember that time he made a list with Rachel's "flaws" and he wrote "She's just a waitress"? UN-effin-believeable! He definitely didn't deserve to end up with her. Rachel deserved better.

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  5. Ross is my least favorite too. But then, there would be no show without the whole Ross+Rachel combo and he does have his moments. I mean when they show the prom video....too cute...still I agree he's a whiny, know-it-all on most accounts!

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  6. hahahah I have to admit I've been sort of routing for Ross and Rachel, but more out of habit I think than anything. Like I know they love each other and are supposed to end up together, so I'm just waiting for it to happen. And maybe because Rachel just kind of annoys the shit out of me too? As awful as he is, they're kind of perfect for eachother.


    I do have to say though, I've always loved Monica and Chandler!


    And as for the "white people in NY" thing - I noticed that myself the other day and haven't been able to stop looking for a single non-white person in the ENTIRE show. I found two - both one-scene-only employees at the museum where Ross works - and I'm in the 5th season at this point. How ridiculous is that?

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  7. Ross is completely the worst. I mean, how can you fail at marriage... that much?

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  8. Ah, so agree. Haha, but I have to admit, that friendzone thing went over my head during my recent rewatch. The whole "on a break" bit was so terrible too. Chandler's always been my fave!

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  9. YES! I just re-watched that episode. He's so smarmy. Honestly, we just watched them kiss for the first time and... I felt nothing. Now I'm just waiting for Monica and Chandler to get together...

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  10. You know, I think it was either Joey or Chandler who said to him early on something about Rachel having him in the friendzone. Whatever, boys. I'm to the point where I inwardly groan when he opens his mouth. But who am I kidding, I'll probably get caught up their storyline anyway...

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  11. Hahah, he does have a terrible track record doesn't he?

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  12. The only non-white recurring cast member I can think of is Aisha Tyler. And when does she appear, like the 9th season or so? And yes, I can't wait for Monica and Chandler! I can't remember what season it is when they start hooking up, though. And, okay, I'm with you--despite protestations against Ross, I know I'm going to totally get into rooting for them!

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  13. Oh man, I am completely prepared to get into the Ross and Rachel storyline, despite how much I dislike Ross now! I always thought that prom video was cute. I feel like it has to be coming up soon too on our re-watch...

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  14. Yeah, I can't wait for the Monica and Chandler storyline to start. I can't even begin to remember when they start hooking up though. And, I'll grudgingly admit, I was beyond glad Ross and Rachel ended up together! It's funny to see him from this new perspective though.

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  15. Hahah, yeah. And I should clarify, I mean Nice Guy as in the guy who just acts nice to get what he wants but isn't really nice at all (which to be fair, I don't think Ross totally is--just felt like being snippy!) and not like a guy who's just kind and thoughtful.

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  16. Agreed on their story being too long and complicated. I kind of like how Monica and Chandler got together and that was that and their storylines featured issues arising from being a couple and etc. Not the constant on and off with Ross and Rachel.

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  17. Once I finish binging Sabrina the Teenage Witch (Amazon Instant Video!), Friends is my next binge. I was pretty young during its heydey, so I only have vague, but good memories of everyone. I will be interested to see how my thoughts change as an adult.


    Side not. Sabrina is a surprisingly feminist show. Like I've already lost count of the number of times someone has referred to the patriarchy, misogyny, sexism, and double standards. It's a heavily white cast, but for the 90s, SUPER feminist.

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