Thursday, October 2, 2014

Sk8er boys and prissy girls

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Leave it to Spotify to remind you of songs you'd mostly forgotten about, like "Sk8er Boi." Full disclosure: I was listening to Katy Perry radio when it came on and, like always, I had a very visceral reaction to her abuse of the word "skater" and "boy."

Past that (though can we ever truly move past using the number 8 to replace the 'ate' sound?), I was reminded of how well Avril has the sexes down. He was a boy, she was a girl. Can I make it any more obvious?

Um. Yes? No? Is this a trick question?

See, in Avril's world there are two types of women: cool girls and prissy bitches. If you're about to make the point that this song is really old and Avril's a grown woman now, I'd refer you to her new songs which don't suggest even the slightest bit of growth because she was smart and realized her fans are eternal tweens.

So as I was saying, in Avril's world, you're either a prissy ballerina who wears her buns too tight or a fun girl who wears Chucks.

Oh, and the only guys worth mentioning are "punks." As in, he was a punk, she did ballet. What more can I say? He wanted her. She'd never tell. But secretly she wanted him as well.

The only thing? All of her friends stuck up their nose and they had a problem with his baggy clothes.

... oh, Avril. Fuck off.

From a prissy girl, fuck off.

Take your Chucks and your sk8er boi boyfriend who's still obsessed with that girl he dated five years ago and fuck off.

The sad thing is, this song is more than a decade old and its basic tenets remain. Women are still encouraged to put other women down to appear cooler. And, maybe, Avril, that's why I feel the need to reiterate how much I think your song is bullshit.

You're not cooler because you skateboard. Or because you wear ball caps backwards. Or because your hair is always impossibly flat-ironed.

Maybe I'm sensitive because I'm always mistaken for the prissy girl, but I've learned to accept that my sense of style is preppy with a side of see you next Tuesday.

Though Avril doesn't know this (shut up, I know Sk8er Boi is old, we already went over this), what you look like and how you dress doesn't determine the kind of person you are. In grown-up world, women aren't automatically assholes because they were in sororities or, shock of all shocks, they were cheerleaders in high school. Or, god forbid, ballerinas.

This idea of the "prissy bitch" is bullshit. Yeah, some women are assholes. It's not because they like "girly" things. It's because they're assholes.

If you're having to put down other women to look cool to guys, you should probably re-evaluate your approach. And if you're trying to impress guys who'd gladly believe someone's a bitch based on how they dress, you should probably re-think who you're into.

21 comments:

  1. Hah! I love this! Il admit that I loved Avril as a kid, but you're so right that there's more to it than how you dress and whether you skateboard. T. Swift does it too with songs like "you belong with me" not only is that such a fucked sentiment, but what's your reasoning? She cheerleads?

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  2. I am literally rolling on the floor laughing. This song is ridic yo.

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  3. Lmao! I was thinking about this song the other day and how I was a devout follower of this mindset back in high school. Thanks be for personal growth!

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  4. Haha! I love how you incorporated those lyrics. And I'm so tired of how there's always just two kinds of girls. The cool or uptight one. The nice modest one or the kind of slutty bitch. Plus, it's so lazy when movies/books just endlessly exploit the cheerleader/sorority/whatever stereotype.

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  5. Thanks a lot. Now this song is stuck in my head AND pissing me off. ;-)

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  6. And if we've read Gone Girl, we all know that girls want to "be the cool girl," but it's all an act. We're all kind of messed up in our own way and we want to be loved and doted on.

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  7. I used to love that song when I was a kid. I mean, I wan't exactly a girly girl so I guess I somehow "identified" with Avril's "sk8t chick" sort of thing.


    With that said, I fully agree with your post here. Why should people be labeled as 'either-or'. Like I said I was never a girly girl, and probably never will be. Instead I was just myself. And I got bullied because of it. I got bullied because I wasn't thin enough or pretty enough or girly enough or I listened to the wrong type of music (Like Avril instead of Britney, Beatles instead of 'Nsync), etc.. I think you get the point. and I think there's just so much wrong with the world, since I think it's gotten even worse over time.


    and the fact is, that even though the bullying happened over ten years ago - I still don't feel good enough.

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  8. I've always hated the competition between 'types' of girls in trying to impress boys. Just be yourself and like who you wanna like and don't judge other people for the way they dress or act or who they want to be friends with or date. Just because a girl likes gaming and football doesn't mean she can't enjoy wearing make up or shopping with the girls. And just because a girl has lots of girl mates, and enjoys cocktails and watched sex and the city, doesn't mean she can't be friends with the boys and enjoys playing video games even if she's shit at them.

    If you're a 'prissy girl' who likes 'skater boys' and that 'skater boy' likes you back, then go for it. Stereotypes suck, people are more than one thing.

    Emma x
    Writing Essays With Wine

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  9. I never got competition between women. Putting someone down, or judging them off their looks isn't going to elevate you any higher on whatever scale you're putting yourself on. And you're right some women, people, are assholes because they just are.

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  10. LOVE this!! "This idea of the "prissy bitch" is bullshit. Yeah, some women are assholes. It's not because they like "girly" things. It's because they're assholes." You're so right-- putting down other women for being themselves is a sign of internal awfulness.

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  11. Oh my god, yeah, Taylor Swift used to do this all the time. But based on recent interviews, she seems to be aware of it now though at least. But yeah, "You Belong with Me" and "Better than Revenge" have the shittiest messages.

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  12. But god did I love it when I was 13!

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  13. Haha, right? I was this person in high school too.

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  14. It really is. It always bothers me in books/movies when a girl is presented as 'cool' because she's different than other girls. "Oh, she doesn't like typical things girls like, wow, she's so cool." Gag. It's beyond lazy.

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  15. I think I spent high school wanting to be the 'cool girl.' It's definitely an act.

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  16. I'm sorry to hear about how you were bullied. This 'either/or' attitude is definitely damaging to all around, but I get why the attitude in the song would be relatable--high school is such a different world.


    It doesn't help that women are brought up to compete with each other and prove they're better.

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  17. Exactly. People are more complicated (ugh, hate how it sounds like I'm referencing her other dumbass song) than that. Instead of trying to feel cooler than everyone else, we should spend more time celebrating other people.

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  18. Haha, yes! Just like Mean Girls. Putting another woman down doesn't make you smarter or prettier. Let's stop being such assholes to each other.

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  19. God, yes. It comes from your own insecurities. I was definitely the asshole who thought I was cooler than other girls in high school and it was completely because I was incredibly insecure.

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  20. I hated that song so much in high school, and still detest it now. Back then, I was super offended of her hating on girls in ballet (because duuuhh, I was in ballet for five years), and of course I also couldn't get past the awful way she decided to spell "skater boy." (I want even type it, it's that horrendous).

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