Friday, September 26, 2014

What's your snob specialty?


I just spent 15 minutes trying to think of a better title for this post and it's not happening, so I'm just going to run with it. What do I mean by snob specialty? I'm talking about that one thing you are a total snob about--whether it's music, film, fashion or, hell, cheese. 

I always liked to pride myself on not being a snob about anything (except maybe Wal-mart), but then my boyfriend lovingly informed me that I'm a total snob about not being a snob. 

I take so much pride in not being a snotty asshole, that I'm a total self-righteous, uh, asshole about it.

In my defense, I feel like I've known too many people who are so caught up in appearing 'cool' that they're totally insufferable about their likes and dislikes when it comes to popular culture. OH MY GOD KATY PERRY'S MUSIC IS A TOTAL CACOPHONY. I CAN'T EVEN HANDLE IT.  Or, OH MY GOD TWILIGHT.

Really? Is there lower hanging fruit than Twilight? Everyone knows it's shit. Some people just choose to get on board and fantasize about a sparkly boyfriend who lives in a glass house with a large bunch of overly pale people.

I don't want to hear about how terrible pop music is. It's popular because it's catchy.

I don't want to hear about how you just can't bring yourself to drink boxed wine. It's called a fucking bargain.

I don't want to hear about how Applebee's is, oh my god, so disgusting. The food isn't at all inventive, sure, but it's not even close to being gross. It's just not packaged in a way that'll make you feel cool for eating it. Don't even care--that won't stop me from eating the shit out of their pretzel bread sticks, oriental chicken salad and white peach sangria. 

You know the people who just so happen to like everything that's considered cool and nothing that isn't and even their guilty pleasures are cool enough in an 'ironic' way? Well, I think they're full of shit. And desperately self-conscious.

But then I think I'm just self-conscious about liking shit. 

It's a vicious cycle. 

So what's your snob specialty? 


  1. Those are called hipsters dear. Those who like everything that's "cool"... OH and they liked it before everyone else did. They're the ones who made it cool. Ugh.. go fuck yourself stupid hipsters.

    Wait til you see what I renamed my blog. I don't even know why I said it in the comments... just be on the lookout :)

  2. I'm a music snob, in a sense that I don't like a lot of music at all (I know, seems impossible right). My poor fiancé, who is all about listening to all sorts of music, always tries to introduce me to some new songs, and I always hate them.

  3. I'm a snob about running shoes and I'm a music snob snob. As in I hate that person who has an opinion on my music...or my DRINK tastes...I'm a snob snob? Yea, we share this and I'm ok with that.

  4. I'm totally a music snob. TOTALLY. But maybe I'm not, since I'm all about some Katy Perry and Miley. Also, HOLD THE PHONE--Applebees has pretzel breadsticks?!?! I really need to go back. The only reason I avoid chain restaurants like that is alllll the sodium. I feel horrendous every time I eat at one, so I try to avoid them...but sometimes, you just need to go to outback and eat a bloomin onion.

  5. Hahah--I love it! It's perfect. And the 'I liked it first' hipsters are the worst of all hipsters. Which is a pretty great accomplishment.

  6. I DO THAT TOO. Especially with people whose reading habits aren't the same as mine. So much just nodding and smiling and "oh yeah, I'll look into that."

  7. Hahah, I do the same thing to my boyfriend and I think he only genuinely likes a couple of bands/singers I've shared with him. He definitely thinks he has better taste than me. Oh well.

  8. We do share this. Katy Perry and fruity cocktails for All! But yes, you are a snob about your running shoes. Those damn shoes.

  9. Yes you absolutely do! But I know what you mean about all the sodium. I can never finish a meal at those types of restaurants. Ever. And yes, Applebees has pretzel breadsticks and I love them like my own blood!

  10. I really enjoyed this post. Oh, okay, fine, I've just spent the past half hour reading several of your posts because I just discovered your blog and you are funny as hell. I really like it here.

    I'm a snob about writing. If something is poorly written, I just can't even.

  11. Oh, that's so nice! Thank you, Karen! I'm glad you find my blog. (Also, I'm definitely a snob about writing too.)