Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Things that really are overrated


It only seems fitting to write about things that really are that overrated following in last week's footsteps. I asked myself if I really wanted to be that person, and the answer is yes. Of course I want to be that person.

So what really is that overrated?

1. Six-packs. This includes beer and abs. Unless they aren't my abs, in which case I'm all for six-packs.

2. Victoria's Secret. If it were up to them I'd be spending $50 on a bra that doesn't even fit me. Get it? I'm making fun of their shitty measuring methods. Because they're really shitty.

3. Sex and the City. Way to be relevant, I know, but sometimes I still flashback to how terrible that second movie was.

4. Old Hollywood. Oh? You love Audrey Hepburn? You don't say.

5. Crash. Emotional manipulation = Oscar gold.

6. Singers who reference better musicians in their songs. You know invoking their name doesn't give you their talent, right? (Sidenote: why is Radiohead the go-to for pop singers? Still love you, Katy.)

7. Chipotle. There I said it and I can't take it back.

8. Daft Punk. You're not a Grammy voter. You don't have to pretend to like them so people think you're hip.

9. Jelly Belly jelly beans. Remember when those used to be the shit? I pretended to like jelly beans for years because of that and now my office has a constant stash and I always grab a handful only to regret it after I eat their version of chocolate and black licorice.

10. Televised singing competitions. When's the last time someone actually had Carrie Underwood success from those things? (Don't prove me wrong by giving me examples. I don't care enough.)

11. Grey's Anatomy. Is this show still on?

12. iPhones. Nobody cares about your iPhone or the apps you have on it.

13. Grocery store gas stations. How is it that everyone and their mother is at all times at the same grocery store gas station?

14. Oysters. Advice for eating food shouldn't include, "just swallow it, don't chew."

15. Anything with the word casserole in it.

15 comments:

  1. Victoria's Secret tells me I'm a C cup. Yeaaaaaaaaah. No. Liars! I had a list of movies to choose from for a paper in school awhile back and I unknowingly chose Crash. :o

    ReplyDelete
  2. Chipotle is amazing, but I forgive you. Also, YES TO iPhone...SERIOUSLY. I want to drop kick them into the ocean never to be seen again and then I hope they get eaten by a shark that then goes to take a nap in the mid-Atlantic ridge's valley, which then get's frozen over and only is disturbed when the world is invaded by aliens and they are like UH, GET THESE iPHONES OUTTA MAH FACE. I'm a Samsung lover and I'm so over iPhone users being all omg, you shoulda got an iPhone because they are so much better. It's called NO.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Words cannot express how much I heart your lists. Ugh, iPhones. Especially when people substitute "my iPhone" for plain old "phone" in every sentence.

    ReplyDelete
  4. mid-Atlantic ridge's valley...in my rage did I mean the Marianas Trench? Yea, I think I did. Whoops.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Everything on this list is the truth.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Haha, at least the movie gives you plenty to write about? And VS told me I was an A-cup, which is 3 sizes off (did I totally just give away my boob size?). I was wearing a layered look so maybe it was hard to tell, but I don't know how she actually suggested that was my size with a straight face. I feel like you have to have a very "standard" type of body shape (which I mean, what does that even mean) for their measuring method to even come close to the right size.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'll forgive you for the mistake, but only because I feel like you're referencing a really wonderful Syfy movie. And Logan is warming me up to Chipotle, I WILL ADMIT. Also, Samsung 4ever! <3 <3 I love my Galaxy.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hahaha, YES. I don't think I've ever once said, "Can you hand me my Galaxy?" But apparently the fact that you own an iPhone is something that you need to remind people a lot. Hell, maybe if I paid that much for a phone, I'd want to namecheck it all the time too.

    ReplyDelete
  9. LOL at Chipotle. I had it a couple times when I lived in Portland.. Don't understand the hype! However - Grey's.... been watching since the beginning and will until the show ends :)!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Haha, I appreciate your loyalty, in that case! Grey's does do a good job of sucking you in..

    ReplyDelete
  11. LMFAO... girl I like you. A lot. You should go to the tumblr account "shit bloggers wear". OMG. Right up your ally.


    I liked the movie Crash. But if you REALLY want a movie to open your eyes about racism... watch American History X. Way better.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Haha, thanks! I am on my way to Shit Bloggers Wear right now. And I won't lie, I was totally hooked while watching Crash-- it completely sucks you in BECAUSE it's so over the top. I still haven't watched American History X, but I should probably change that.

    ReplyDelete