Monday, November 4, 2013

How to write about Halloween

Step 1: Start writing when you're still hungover from the Halloween party you went to to remind yourself that you're not completely worthless.

I hate you, but I love you.
Throw in a clever joke about how revenge is a dish best served... in any other way but this terrible, wonderful pink liquor.

Step 2: Post the photos of yourself in costume from every possible angle that you made your boyfriend and mom take until the lighting was just right.





















Step 3: Make sure you explain in no less than 1,000 words how your costume came to be.

WELL. The theme of the party I went to was "Black and Red" with the idea of dressing up in something you'd wear to a séance. I already owned this black dress, black eye make-up and black nail polish, so naturally I went with the black half of the theme and called myself a goth doll.

My make-up isn't nearly as intense as it could have been because I am above all things a vain bitch and also I'm lazy. What's that about painting my skin white to make it look like porcelain? Ugh, why would I want to walk around with paint on me all night? The fake eyelashes were annoying enough.

Step 4: Post a cute photo of you and your boyfriend in costume. No, we're not matching, okay? Somebody didn't like my idea of wearing crushed red velvet. You know, for the séance.

I'll love you forever if you know who he is.
Step 5: Don't mention how you spent the last hour of the party locked in the bathroom because someone couldn't handle their sweet revenge. Oh shit. Forget I said that part.

Step 6: Publish your post four days after Halloween when no one cares anymore because duh November is for THANKSGIVING.
 
 
 

14 comments:

  1. Ha! I did my Halloween recap today too! I think the crushed red velvet would have been a great costume!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hahah, that bottle looks dangerous and delicious. Love both your outfits.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I know who he is and I think he should have worn the crushed velvet to match your outfit instead of that! You look EXCELLENT.

    ReplyDelete
  4. haha omg #5. yes. i do still care about halloween. i really do. but then again im a weirdo.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sweet Revenge sounds like trouble! I will always care about Halloween even in November!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Can I just say, that quite a few moments (2,4,5) are things that I have done! And I loved this, who cares how its after Halloween...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Haha--well it turns out several people didn't follow the theme so he wasn't out of place, but crushed red velvet would have been good!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thanks! And it is sooo dangerous. Because it tastes really good (at least mixed with stuff) so you just keep drinking and drinking.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Thanks, Lix! It was a lot of fun to do my hair and make-up, but it probably took me upwards to 2 hours until I was satisfied with the look though... so probably won't be doing it again anytime soon.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Haha, glad I'm in good company then. I still have a bowl full of candy so Halloween's not really over anyway.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh my god, it definitely is trouble! I read to mix it with lemonade, and it was so good, so you don't realize how much you've had until it's way too late. Oops.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Haha, thanks Caitlyn. I just really wish I hadn't done #5. Ugh.

    ReplyDelete
  13. haha, is he Repair Man (Man Man Man...)? That's too funny! Your costume is so adorable, I think it's just enough. Who needs a bunch of face paint, right?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Haha, someone else asked that too! It's a really good guess, but he's actually Captain Hammer from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog. And I agree, face paint would've just been miserable to scrape off the next morning!

    ReplyDelete